What can you tell from my face?
My clothes?
My movements?
How much can you know before we speak?
Female. White. Young. Pretty.
Well-dressed. Confident. Wealthy.
Worthy?
Yes, we speak.
What else can you find?
Friendly. Intelligent. Aloof. Polite.
Cultured. Talkative. Educated.
But where?
I know.
You don’t know.
You can’t tell.
Can you guess?
British? French? American?
No, not quite. What accent?
It’s confusing.
I’m sorry.
Let me explain.
I’m different.
It’s embarrassing.
Oh really? I see. I understand.
No, I don’t. Not exactly.
Tell me again.
Born Texas twang.
Raised American generic.
Educated London posh.
Lived broken Japanese.
That explains it.
That doesn’t explain it.
Your accent keeps changing.
Strange. Suspicious.
I don’t realize it.
I realize when you notice it.
I’ll try to control it.
But which accent should I choose?
Accents should be tied to your hometown.
You should speak like your parents and the others where you’re from.
But I haven’t lived there in years.
My parents speak differently.
I cannot remember it.
This feels forced.
That’s not me.
What do you mean?
Then who are you?
I’m from Texas.
I’m American.
But I want to return to London. I belong there.
I miss Japan. It was my home.
Why do I have to choose?
I cannot place your accent.
Accent confusion.
Identity confusion.
You’re right.
That’s true.
Where is home?
Where am I from?
How should I speak?
How should I dress?
How should I move?
You are young. You have time.
You are female. Someone will guide you.
You are pretty. People will forgive you.
That’s not an answer.
I can’t find the answer.
Tell me the answer.
Who am I?
I cannot say.
There’s not a category.
Keep searching. Keep asking.
Yes, I’m searching. Always searching.
My words sound strange.
They define my identity.
Both are changing.
Keep watching. Keep listening.
You will know me.
Lauren S. Power
Age 25
USA, UK, Japan, Singapore
Initiate-Influence-Improve
www.laurenspower.com
This is the first in a series of excerpts from the soon-to-be published The Worlds Within TCK Anthology. A portion of the book’s profits will be donated to the FIGT David C Pollock Scholarship Fund.
