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After FIGT member Brandi Goode experienced the sudden death of a loved one while living abroad, she sought help through the grieving process. She shares her journey in this FIGT Focus for February, Grief.

By Brandi Goode

This article discusses topics such as suicide, grief and loss. We acknowledge that this content may be difficult to read. If you believe that you will find the discussion to be traumatizing, you may choose to not read the article. We care for the safety and well-being of the members of our community.

It was 5 am in Tokyo, and my phone wouldn’t stop ringing. Groggy from a late night out celebrating my husband’s birthday, and just into my 7^th week of first-time pregnancy, I reluctantly picked up. 

Ready to (mildly) berate my family for forgetting the time difference yet again, I was jolted awake by my stepmother’s greeting: “Brandi, you need to wake up. Your mom died.”

Writing these words, I’m transported back to that moment, a heavy stone settling in my core. I collapsed on the floor and crawled to my husband’s side, reeling from the news. I didn’t understand how could this happen; I had just spoken to my mother the day before. Surely there had been a mistake.  

Processing Grief, Internally and Externally

Though I had lived abroad for the better part of my adult life by then, I had never experienced the sudden death of a loved one. Especially not the person who knew me best in this world. As the story of my mother’s death unfolded in chapters during my journey to the airport, flight around the world, and car ride to my hometown, each revelation ripped a new hole in my heart. My mother had died by suicide.

In the months that followed, I attempted to process the loss, the most intimate encounter with death I’d had in my charmed life till then. Preserving my mental and physical health were vital, considering the tiny miracle growing inside me. 

I recognized that I needed to find some personal, spiritual way to quiet my raging grief. This I found through prayer on our leafy patio. My mom was deeply religious, so this daily practice soothed my soul and made me feel more connected to her.

Finding Help Where You Least Expect It

Still, there was a bigger need to fulfill as part of the grieving process. It’s so important to talk with people about your loss and the feelings that come with that. Phone conversations across continents didn’t satisfy that need, and I was too ashamed to share the true story of my mom’s death with my closest friends in Tokyo at the time.

I did end up unexpectantly sharing my story with the wife of my husband’s colleague one evening. I barely knew her, but she had recently had a baby and seemed genuinely interested in helping me get through this as a fellow first-time mom abroad. Turns out, her mother suffers from manic behavior and depression, much as mine did, and she could completely relate. 

In the expat world, you often don’t know the full story of the travelers you meet along the way. If you’re brave and honest enough to speak up about your issues, you really never know who could become a trusted friend in time of need. 

Choosing a Counselor with Whom You Connect

Japan, like so many countries, has long held suicide as a taboo subject. Most of the time I wasn’t even sure how to broach the subject when people asked about my mom. Part of me was terrified that by talking too much about it, I would unleash a torrent of emotions that would send me spiraling into a depression that could threaten the viability of my pregnancy.

So, I opted for a more anonymous approach. The language barrier was a challenge, but fortunately there was a local nonprofit that offered counselling sessions in English. I attended these sessions dutifully each week, crying my heart out to a sweet Japanese woman who listened well but said little. 

In the end, while I’m certain talking about my mother’s death was necessary, I’m not sure how much that counselor truly helped. I believe it would have been more beneficial to talk to someone with whom I felt a cultural affinity, and/or a counsellor specializing in grieving the loss of a loved one by suicide. Counselling is a healthy way to process grief, but finding a therapist is not a one-size-fits-all affair. It’s critical to find a counselor or therapist with whom you connect to get the most out of grief counselling.

Harnessing Technology to Share across Borders

Today, eight years on, there are so many individuals doing online counselling and organizations offering grief support groups. Personally, I’ve found comfort in the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention’s Healing Conversations program. Speaking to someone who has been there helps immensely, particularly in the immediate aftermath of loss, when the doubts and questions can be overwhelming. 

I’m so thankful for the proliferation of video chat that has made it easier to find just the right person to talk to in any part of the world. Time zones aside, this is such a gift for expats, particularly those with fragile or non-existent support systems abroad, or those living in a country whose language and culture differ substantially from their own.

Erasing Expat Guilt

Expat guilt is another emotional battlefield I had to navigate when my mother died. I felt extremely guilty that I wasn’t physically there for her in the weeks and months leading up to her death. She died alone, and that will forever sadden me. 

It’s inevitable to question your path as an expat when facing illness or death across the ocean back home. I often wondered in the months following my mother’s death if I should have recognized her state of distress and gone home before she took her life. 

However, I came to recognize that my intelligent, ambitious, vivacious mother would have wanted me to pursue my dreams and happiness wherever they may lie. That reality dawned on me when I gave birth to my son seven months after her passing. I believe my mother—like any loving mom anywhere in the world—wanted me to live my best life, a life that would make her proud. In continuing to chart my own path and follow my heart, I’m honoring her each day.

Brandi Goode is a storyteller with an incurable case of wanderlust. Born in Louisiana, she lived in South America and Asia for 15 years before moving to her current home in Switzerland. Brandi works for a digital marketing agency and is finishing her first book titled Powering through a Pandemic: How COVID-19 Shaped the Lives of Women in 32 Countries. You can connect with her at www.brandigoode.com.

FIGT member Sarah Korbus tackles this month's Focus, Grief, by sharing with our community how to talk about loss and the feelings around it, and how we may become stronger for it.

By Sarah Kobrus

For it’s our grief that gives us our gratitude,

Shows us how to find hope, if we ever lose it.

So ensure that this ache wasn’t endured in vain.

Give it purpose, use it. -Amanda Gorman

“Mummyyy?” Jonny(4) piped up from the back of our Land Cruiser on the way to school in Doha

“Yes, Jonny.” I wasn’t really listening, focusing on surviving the mad rush hour traffic.

“You know yesterday… ah’mmnn talking bout you being poorly… and having hoperation?” He now had my full attention. 

My eyes locked with his in the rear-view mirror as he asked a bombshell of a question. “Mummyyy. Are you going to die?”

When I moved to the Middle East over twenty years ago, talking to my three kids about cancer was definitely not in my travel plans. Like most parents, I wanted to protect them from loss and grief-and definitely from pain. Yet, before they reached double digits, they’d been with both grandfathers when they suddenly died, seen their mum become very ill and were living in their 3^rd country: a cocoon of compounding loss. 

Talking about tough stuff

Talking about loss and grief isn’t easy, often uncomfortable and even painful. Our urge to dodge pain is a natural human reaction. But, comes at significant cost. As the renown mental health expert, Dr Gabor Mate, says. “When we flee our vulnerability, we lose our capacity for feeling emotion.”*

As well as being an accompanying partner and TCK mum, I’ve been a social worker and counsellor for over thirty years-talking about the toughest stuff with the most vulnerable. One thing I know about grief is that if loss is hidden, unnamed, unconsciously experienced, this is when it’s harmful for our mental, emotional and physical health. Numbing or hiding the tough stuff also dulls and blunts the good stuff. We experience loss in our bodies, minds and souls because it’s so closely related to all that we believe and value; that central paradox in life - we grieve because we love. 

The transforming power in loss and grief

Because loss is part of any change, globally mobile folks have so many everyday opportunities to practise talking about tough stuff. When loss and grief are explored openly, honestly and gently, they can become an energetic force for good, building deeper connection and compassion within ourselves and with others. This also show us how to build robust resilience; because practising on smaller losses means we will know how to handle the bigger stuff that everyone will face in life. 

A therapeutic coaching tool that has helped my family do this is Emotional Logic (link below). This is a system of practical coaching tools that gave us a shared emotional language and a guidebook to navigate through loss. 

How to talk about tough stuff 101

• Be prepared for grief, educate yourself about loss then pass this on to your loved ones.
• Keep it simple. 
• It’s ok to say. “I don’t know-yet.”
• Don’t make any promises that you may not be able to keep.

Back to that car journey. My first reaction was an inner cry, **** why didn’t he ask me last night? But thankfully, my professional voice kicked in. “That’s such a good question, Jonny! Let’s pull over somewhere safe, then we can talk.” As I looked for a layby, Beth (9) jumped in. 

“You know what, Jonny…” She tickled him until he squealed. “We’re all going to die!” The last bit was delivered with such over the top drama that they both burst out laughing. Which was too much for Alice (5). Her eyes filled up over her constantly sucked thumb. 

Pulling her into my lap, I bravely cheered. “But not yet!” 

Who knew that the chats we’d had, the books we’d read and pictures we’d drawn after the loss of their Grandfather’s would return to bless me in quite this way? We were prepared. We had the words and the safe place in our relationship to talk about anything. 

The useful purpose of loss and grief

This journey through loss-that I wouldn’t have chosen for my kids-expanded their hearts and their souls. Their resilience grew because of how we embraced our pain, with the bonus that their compassion for others also flourished. My TCKs are now in their twenties; loss and grief gave them the purpose that they use every day. They’ve all chosen careers that help others; a teacher, trainee art therapist and life sciences undergraduate; alongside plotting to resume their globally mobile life as soon as the world opens up again. 

Reference

*Gabor Mate: In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts

 Resources

https://www.emotionallogiccentre.org.uk 

https://www.macmillan.org.uk 

Sarah is a UK registered social worker, certified counsellor and Emotional Logic coach, specialising in loss, grief, trauma and resilience. She has a private coaching practice, details below and loves working with accompanying partners, older TCK’s and ATCKs.She is also a writer and will publish Good Grief: 7 Stepping Stones to Peace, Hope and Wholeness for the Globally Mobile later this year. She was awarded a publishing prize with Jo Parfitt, Summertime Publishing during the pandemic and is working on her memoir Count Only Sunny Hours. Sarah has lived in America, Bahrain, Qatar, France, Holland and is currently in Cumbria, England. She is presenting a tabletop talk, ‘Recover, Reset, Renew your Resilience,’ introducing the Emotional Logic method during the FIGT conference in March 2022.

sarah@sarahkobrus.com

https://sarahkobrus.com 

In the second part of this two-part series, FIGT member Ema Naito shares how, with a few thoughtful choices, your slides and posters can reach a greater audience.

By Ema Naito

If you missed Part 1 of this article, find it here.

Tips for writing: Slides & posters

Some of us will have slides and all presenters are invited to submit e-posters, so here are additional tips for writing.

1. Stick to one key message per slide, per sentence. 

Use short sentences, no more than 15-20 words long (on average—for variety, you make some shorter and some longer).

It makes the sentences easier to read and understand.

(Source: “How to write plain English,” Plain English Campaign.)

2. Say WHO is doing WHAT

When writing in English, make sure you make it clear WHO is doing WHAT.

That often means you should try to use the active voice.

Passive: The challenges were acknowledged (by zombies?).

Active: We acknowledged the challenges.

If you can add “by zombies” at the end, that may mean it’s in the passive voice :)

In passive voice, WHO is doing the action can get easily hidden. Unless the focus is on WHAT was done, make sure you’re clear on the WHO.

3. Keep the WHO & the WHAT close

Following from the point above, you also should try to keep that WHO and the WHAT close to each other in the sentence. It will help readers from getting lost.

BEFORE

People from across cultures as well as corporations, small businesses, international schools, relocation services, diplomatic corps, non-profits, academia, media and the arts come to this conference. 

[By the time you get to the WHAT (“come”), you’ve forgotten about the WHO (“people”).]

AFTER

People come to this conference from across many cultures. Participants also come from corporations, small businesses, international schools, relocation services, diplomatic corps, non-profits, academia, media and the arts.

You may also need to cut the sentences into two.

4. Consider readability

Readability isn’t about making things look pretty. It’s about making your slides and e-posters accessible to your diverse audiences.

(And it will help make your slides and e-posters more inviting, so people will want to read them.)

Fonts

Pick fonts that are readable and use a legible size.

• For presentations: 28 pt or bigger (but some fonts are easier to read than others so choose wisely)

• On screen: sans serif fonts are easier to read (because they have evenly thicker lines)

• Use only two different fonts, max. (unless you know what you’re doing)

White space

“White space is thinking space.”

Don’t cram everything you can onto your slides or e-posters. It’s

• difficult (if not impossible) to read
• overwhelming
• uninviting—who would want to read it?

Less is more. Use only key words and simplified graphics.

That way, the audience can listen to you (the screen doesn’t compete for their attention). 

It doesn’t overwhelm your audience (imagine if you had anxiety or were stressed). It makes it easier for anyone using a screen reader to follow.

And it forces you to focus on your most important messages.

(You can always add links where people can learn more if they want.)

Contrast

Be careful of the colors you use.

Consider the following: 

People can’t read this—the colors are too stark (and anxiety-inducing!) or the contrast is too weak.

How about this:

Also consider if someone is color-blind. It will look different.

So if you use red to mean “bad” and green for “good,” make sure the information is conveyed in other ways too. Don’t rely only on color.

Summary

So! To sum up:

When speaking

Choose your words

Focus on action

• Use active verbs (rescue the actions from the nouns)

Speak SLOWLY!

When writing: Posters, slides

Be selective

• Stick to one key message per slide, per sentence

• Write short sentences (15-20 words per sentence)

Design for readability

• Use big text & legible fonts

• Use white space

• Consider contrast

Resources

There are many great resources out there on all the points above.

Plain language 

• Plain English Campaign (including “The A-Z of alternative words”)

• PlainLanguage.gov (US government)

• Inclusion Guideline: How to Write Inclusive Copy 

Accessibility

• PRCA Accessible Communications Guidelines (direct link to PDF)

• UK Gov - Dos and Don'ts of designing for accessibility

Design basics

• Robin Williams. 2014. The Non-Designer’s Design Book (4th ed.).

• Fundamental design principles for non-designers

• Typography elements everyone needs to understand

Presentations

• Jonathan Schwabisch. 2016. Better Presentations: A Guide for Scholars, Researchers, and Wonks. Links to other resources from his website

* Many thanks to Sarah Black, Athru Communications, for the accessibility & inclusion resources.

Ema Naito is an English editor who is passionate about clear, plain language. A bilingual third culture kid, Ema grew up between Tokyo and the US East Coast. She now lives in Bangkok, is an FIGT volunteer, and will be hosting a Kitchen Table Conversation at FIGT2022. You can find more of her tips on clear and accessible writing at www.TheClarityEditor.com. 

In Part One of this two-part series, FIGT member Ema Naito shares how, with a few thoughtful choices, your written and spoken presentations can reach a greater audience.

By Ema Naito-Bhakdi

FIGT brings together globally mobile people. That means many of us have plenty of experience talking to people from different parts of the world.

Then why are we talking about how to use clear English at FIGT conferences?

It’s because FIGT wants everyone—that includes you!—to feel they can fully take part in FIGT activities and that they are valuable, contributing members of this community.

And using clear English is one of our tools to create that space.

(I loosely define clear English as English that is understandable and accessible to as many people as possible.)

And of course, clear English will also help us, FIGT2022 presenters, be trusted and understood by our audiences.

What’s in this article:

• Our audience is diverse

• Tips for presenting & speaking

• Tips for writing

• Resources

A reminder: Our audience is diverse

Without an audience, our presentations are nothing.

We all know that FIGT audiences are diverse, in cultures and religions, languages, passports, socioeconomic backgrounds, identities, and family structures, not to mention experiences of trauma, disabilities (physical and mental, temporary and permanent), and current stress levels.

All these affect how we understand and engage with the world around us.

But also remember that FIGT2022 audiences are diverse in experiences of mobility and familiarity with FIGT.

• We have different experiences of mobility. Some of us move countries every year; some haved lived abroad once. Some cross cultures daily through family, school, or work. Some choose to move; some are forced. All different.
  
• We have different levels of familiarity with FIGT. Our organization is remarkable that members stay for decades, but we also welcome many new faces each year. Remember that the words and ideas we casually use (e.g., “TCK”) may be new to many.

Tips for presenting & speaking

So! Here are some things to keep in mind to more effectively communicate with our FIGT audience.

1. Be aware of your word choice

Avoid slang, figures of speech, cultural references

In slang and figures of speech, the literal meaning of the words do not match the intended meaning.

“I chickened out” (got scared and didn’t do something).

“It’s so whitebread” (plain).

“He wears his heart on his sleeve” (shows his intimate emotions honestly).

(Can you find all 27 English figures of speech in this drawing by graphic artist Ella Baron?)

Also watch out for cultural references, like referring to TV and film, sports, fashion trends, celebrities, and music.

These can make it difficult for people to understand what you are trying to say.

They also are often used to signal that we’re members of the same group—but if we don’t understand the reference, we feel left out.

Avoid jargon & acronyms – if you must use them, EXPLAIN

This one is especially important for our researchers and specialists! We can get so used to using certain words that we forget: not everyone knows what those words mean.

For example, post-colonialism, translanguaging, TCK.

Try to use as few of those special words as possible.

If you must use technical words, have the courtesy to explain them the first time you mention them.

Offer a simple definition. Formal definitions can often be too technical, so choose something that will let your audience easily understand and remember the concept.

And remind people what those words mean from time to time.

2. Use short “plain” words

Don’t try to sound “sophisticated.” Use the shorter words.

See “The A to Z of alternative words”, Plain English Campaign, for more.

3. Find the action: Find the verb

Often, we “smother” (hide) the action as nouns. But actions are more interesting and engaging, human.

So rescue those verbs!

If you can put the “I” and the “you” back into the sentence, then that’s even better. 

4. Speak slowly

Remember to speak slowly! Practice and time yourself.

Speaking slowly will give the audience a chance to understand what you are saying. If you go too fast, more people will get lost or overwhelmed.

Also, don’t be afraid of pauses. They can give precious space for the audience to think, feel, process what you’re sharing.

Summary

So! To sum up:

When speaking

Choose your words

Focus on action

• Use active verbs (rescue the actions from the nouns)

Speak SLOWLY!

Resources

There are many great resources out there on all the points above.

Plain language 

• Plain English Campaign (including “The A-Z of alternative words”)

• PlainLanguage.gov (US government)

• Inclusion Guideline: How to Write Inclusive Copy 

Accessibility

• PRCA Accessible Communications Guidelines (direct link to PDF)

• UK Gov - Dos and Don'ts of designing for accessibility

Design basics

• Robin Williams. 2014. The Non-Designer’s Design Book (4th ed.).

• Fundamental design principles for non-designers

• Typography elements everyone needs to understand

Presentations

• Jonathan Schwabisch. 2016. Better Presentations: A Guide for Scholars, Researchers, and Wonks. Links to other resources from his website

* Many thanks to Sarah Black, Athru Communications, for the accessibility & inclusion resources.

Find Part 2 of this article, here.

Ema Naito is an English editor who is passionate about clear, plain language. A bilingual third culture kid, Ema grew up between Tokyo and the US East Coast. She now lives in Bangkok, is an FIGT volunteer, and will be hosting a Kitchen Table Conversation at FIGT2022. You can find more of her tips on clear and accessible writing at www.TheClarityEditor.com. 

Families in Global Transition is thrilled to announce that longtime Gold-level sponsor Patterson Partners Ltd/CrossBorder Living is now our Platinum Sponsor! 

What made Managing Partner and Visionary Jennifer Patterson decide to sponsor this year at the Platinum level? She spoke of her journey with FIGT, growing out of founder Ruth Van Reken’s vision, and how she’s shared what she’s learned with her international financial advisory and wealth management clients:

 

“Truthfully, I think that I owe a lot to FIGT and its broader worldwide community.”

“When I was considering increasing our commitment to FIGT, I thought back to 2007 when I first attended the conference in Houston. I resonated with the story of gathering around Ruth's kitchen table to brainstorm, comfort, seek to understand - and how that – gathering around a table ‒ was (and still is) an elegant solution for achieving a positive impact in someone's life.”

 

 “Over the years I have witnessed the idea of conversations at a single table grow to many conversations at many tables around the world. In addition, the conversations expanded from issues arising from mobility to include issues and situations arising in multi-cultural and multi-national families. Inclusivity has always been the rule.”

 

“As an individual, it helped me understand that my initial experience with being an expat was "normal". When I started expanding that conversation for myself to include the legal and mental transition from "expat" to "immigrant", I found that again, I was not alone. And as a cross-cultural parent having this context for myself helped enormously, in addition to the many resources that have come through the years.”

 

Once I understood myself better, I started engaging in the conversation more with clients ‒ ultimately dedicating my professional work to what I started referring to as cross-border financial planning with a few financial planning peers who were also cross-cultural and multi-national. My conversations with clients and peers started focusing on how to adapt and adjust the financial aspects to handle the transitions while keeping focused on the long term too, even if it's not clear exactly what that looks like.

 

“Sponsorship is just one small way of saying: Thank you for helping me so many years ago. Thank you, Ruth, for the inspiration to do more and be more. And thank you for all the positive work being brought forward to our global village by the leadership and members of FIGT."

FIGT thanks Jennifer and Patterson Partners Ltd/CrossBorder Living for their immense, ongoing support of our organization, and of our broader globally mobile community. 

With previous experience serving on the FIGT Board, Megan Norton shares her goals in her new role as FIGT Treasurer, and encourages the greater FIGT community to get involved and volunteer!

We are excited to introduce FIGT member Megan Norton in her new position as Treasurer on the FIGT board. Below, Megan has written a short message:

Hello FIGT members!

FIGT is one of my favorite communities to be a part of! Collectively, we have so many diverse voices and experiences; it is always intriguing to hear our members’ different perspectives and stories of both global and local transitions. 

There are several ways to get involved in FIGT and I believe one of the most rewarding is to serve as a volunteer. I am grateful for the appointment to serve as FIGT’s Treasurer through October 2022. When I answered the Treasurer call for application in November, I was hopeful to be able to serve on the board once again. I value the opportunity to be in this leadership position and I look forward to sustaining the financial health of the organization through my role responsibilities. The onboarding process has been swift over the past few weeks and I am grateful for the Executive Committee’s embrace as I learn the duties of this position. 

I encourage more of our FIGT members to volunteer within the board committees in order to sustain and grow our global community. You can reach me at treasurer@figt.org; I’d love to hear from you!

Kindly,

Megan

FIGT member Sinéad Galvin shares with us the delightful end-of-year holidays and traditions from Spain.

By Sinéad Galvin

My name is Sinéad and I am a FIGT newbie. I’m Irish and although I have lived in many other countries, Spain has been my home for many, many years. For that reason I wanted to share some of Spain’s Christmas traditions. 

 

For families that might be celebrating their first Christmas in Spain then it is high time to learn about the Spanish Christmas customs or traditions as they might differ from those to which you are already accustomed. 

 

Nochebuena (Christmas eve)

Christmas eve is celebrated on December 24 and is of huge importance, it is generally a big family affair. Usually, members of the extended family gather around a feast which although differs depending on where you are in Spain will almost certainly include; jamón (Spanish ham), marisco (sea food), cordero (leg of lamb), pescado (fish), meat, wine and all kinds of desserts

In many homes, especially with children, Nochebuena is a very exciting night: it’s when Papá Noel (Santa Claus) brings gifts to all the children who have been good during the year. Some regions of Spain have their own traditions: in the Basque Country, it’s Olentzero who leaves the gifts, while children from Cataluña and Aragón receive gifts from Tió de Nadal.

It's really important to note that Spanish kids traditionally received their Christmas presents from Los Reyes Magos (the Three Kings) affectionately known as Melchior, Gaspar and Baltazar on 6^th January. My Spanish husband never celebrated Santa but I suppose in these global items, Santa is slowly making headway in Spanish homes. Because of Los Reyes, Spanish kids do not go back to school until 8^th January.

 

Caga Tió (literally means pooping log!)

The Caga Tió – or Tió de Nadal (Christmas Log) as he is sometimes called – is a smallish wooden log, covered in a blanket and usually given a warm, smiley face. You’ll find Caga Tió for sale in Christmas markets across the two main provinces from which he originates, Catalonia and Aragon. Come Christmas time, the log is expected to ‘poop’ presents for children and their parents, much to the amusement and amazement of younger spectators.

El Gordo

Although several lotteries, national and continental, take place daily and weekly in Spain, the most famous and eagerly-awaited of all is the El Gordo ('fat') draw, held without fail on December 22, even when this is a Sunday. It has been held every year since 1812, and the winning numbers are sung out by school children.

 

Nochevieja (New Years Eve)

Spaniards spend the final moments before the clock strikes midnight preparing to ring in the new year. People gather in plazas or homes to eat the 12 uvas de la suerte (12 lucky grapes). For each grape, you make one wish for the new year. The goal, when the clock strikes midnight, eat each grape, one by one, in 12 seconds. Most certainly not recommended for young children!

Belens (Christmas crib)

Beléns are elaborate nativity scenes – it is the Spanish word for Bethlehem. More than just a stable with animals and figurines, however, the Spanish beléns can be huge scenes, complete with many different houses, farms, rivers and marketplaces. They really are spectacular to see.

 

Dia de los Santos Inocentes (Fools’ day)

The Spanish versión of April’s fool’s day takes place on December 28th.

Roscón de Reyes (Spanish variation of Christmas cake)

The roscón is a sweet bread (almost like a brioche) that is baked into a circle or an oval shape. It isn’t always filled, but traditional fillings include whipped cream, chocolate cream, meringue or custard cream. It is typical to decorate the cake with colorful candied fruits, creating what looks like a king’s crown full of sparkling jewels. Bakers hide small trinkets throughout the cake, so be careful when biting into this pastry.

In our last FIGT focus blog on careers, member Doreen Cumberford shares the various perspectives gained from decades of working abroad. 

By Doreen Cumberford

The last two years have revealed fast-moving trends in the field of global careers. Covid-19 has transformed our globe in so many ways and careers have become more portable, flexible and transferable. Careers also deliver a combination of hindsight, foresight and insight.

Hindsight

The globally mobile lifestyle offers so much variety, novelty and complexity that this challenges our old ideas and mindset that a person needs to have a consistently focused decades long career. Careers are transforming as fast as or faster than humans. Modern careers are required to span geography, decades, and cultures. Yet institutions, governments and missions rely on stable personnel to deliver consistent productivity along the way. Technology has created a career revolution. When a two-career family or partnership is involved, the level of complexity grows exponentially.

There is a story where someone asks a wise man, “Tell me sir, in which field could I make a great career?”, to which he answered, 

“Be a great human being. There is a lot of opportunity in that area and very little competition.” 

While life always serves up opportunities to be better human beings, is it possible that this could be the purpose for a career also?

More of us are becoming digitally and geographically mobile throughout all stages of life. Remote work has never been this popular and people who have been shackled to a desk for decades are now waking up to the novelty, freedom, and possibilities of international travel paired with work.  There used to be niches previously populated by diplomatic and mission services, corporate expats, NGOs, military etc. who had no choice of location.  The job and the country was dictated by the institution, now more jobs and locations are selected by the individual.

After University in Glasgow, Scotland I was actively looking for a career that would also give me the benefits of surfing the globe and joined the British Diplomatic Service. Four decades, eight countries and four continents later I achieved that, just not in the way I had anticipated. It took leaping from government to corporate to entrepreneurship and cobbling together skills and passions along the way. 

I was pretty sure my career had died when I moved to the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia in 1992. As a first-time mother and trailing spouse, I loved staying home for a season but a few short years later I was ready for more self-expression in the form of a career.

Foresight

More humans are now discovering geographical freedom in a way we have never witnessed before. This is disrupting the way we have thought about work and occupations in general. There are basically two questions we can ask regarding careers. 

 

 Where can my career take me? 

        or

 Where can I take my career? 

More and more people are asking the second question “where can I take my career?”. 

In the US alone there are 10.9 million people who would describe themselves as digital nomads. This is an increase of 49% since 2019, just a few short months ago!  While the majority are Millennials ranging from between 25 and 40 years of age, the average age of a digital nomad in 2021 is 32 years old. 

There was also a substantial rise in Baby Boomers (aged 57-75 years old) who chose to become what I call “Slowmads”, nomads traveling slowly.  These are seniors many are former expats (like me), who simply decline the option to be rooted to only one place. Many are still vibrant, capable and have not given up their curiosity and love of learning to retire to a rocking chair.

In many cases Boomers have extended their careers by simply transforming their skillset, mindset, and attention to freelance and consulting work. To that they have added a decision to live overseas again either part or full time. They are combining what they fondly call side-hustles with their previous corporate skills and making unlikely contributions designed to connect the globe and while making their unique difference. It is frequently inspiring to listen to their stories and get an inkling into their wisdom.

Yesterday I chatted to one of these “Slowmads”. He is currently in Mexico for six months awaiting changes in the Vietnamese visa system that will permit him to return to Vietnam for the following six months. With time, talent, and resources on his hands he is using his corporate experience to build an initiative specifically for mural artists. His vision, is to provide a clearing house for artists across the globe with opportunities for them to travel, take their portable skills and offer services in other countries. 

While the world seems shut down from many perspectives, if we look carefully there is massive activity and surprising social migration. From marketing teams to magicians, doctors to data-base experts, people are discarding their desks and making geographical leaps into our lane, the global transition lane.

While many new digital nomads are choosing this overseas lifestyle to improve work/life balance, or seek adventure, the outcome is always predictable, there will be much to learn and reflect on. This transforms into insight.

Insight

As Families in Global Transition we stand at the threshold of welcoming a new community of fellow travelers who live in transition. We can open the tent flap, invite people in and share all the decades of wisdom, reflection and experience that reside within our hearts and minds.

But what are the greatest gifts here? I believe they are a combination of the elements that our careers have deposited along the road.  Perhaps the real question should be, how are our careers leading us to become better human beings? 

Insight frequently arrives in the form of reflection.  As we have traversed the globe, we have either packed our careers and taken them with us, or we have gone where the career led.  Many of us have done both and now share, shine, and shore up the value of all the life lessons that are built into a global lifestyle.

Perhaps hindsight, foresight and insight are in fact what makes the world, and our careers go around.  Let’s use our globalness for good.

In our FIGT Focus on Career, FIGT member Nikki Cornfield shares how her global journey uprooted her career path, but led her on a journey to find her authentic self.

By Nikki Cornfield

As a newlywed and in the first bloom of pregnancy, the paint was barely dry on the wall in our beloved new home when he dropped the bombshell question- 

“So how do you fancy living overseas?” 

The question hung heavy in the air between us. 

I was in the glorious nesting phase, and finally putting down roots after a career in the skies.  We were still reeling from the shock of 9/11, swiftly followed by the collapse of Enron, and his career; two bowling balls that had been thrown in our path sending us in a spin and the search for work. This was a time before the internet, a time before online working and a time before the term ‘global nomad’ or ‘expat’ were commonly  known.  

I followed him to The Netherlands with a six-week-old baby, in the middle of winter and to a house I had never seen. Who was that woman? I don’t recognize her now.  

I was naïve then, I hadn’t put much priority on what I wanted, my own dreams and aspirations I had somehow allowed to be pushed to one side. I remember the grief of leaving everything I loved behind. Without any secure foundations, those delicate first few months of transitions into motherhood were traumatic. This was the slippery slope to post-natal depression and the first layers of unresolved grief to be laid.  In a time before zoom, messenger, and social media, my life in each new country was at the beginning isolating, a blank slate to fill. Communication to friends and family overseas not the ease it is today. Not having a portable career proved my downfall but this was a time before online business was the norm. I took opportunities as they came along, spontaneity opened doors. Often, this happened without me even looking for them.  

FIGT member, Daniela Draugelis, explains how a strategic volunteering can make a difference in someone else's life, while also giving your own career a boost in the right direction. 

By Daniela Draugelis

Michelle Obama said, “Success isn’t about how much money you make, it’s about the difference you make in people’s lives.” Making a difference through volunteering is a great way to merge purposeful work while at the same time adding value to your career. 

Many expat spouses find themselves unable to work when they arrive in a new country due to the lack of a work visa or work permit, which can lead to disappointment and frustration, and a sense of loss. However, strategic volunteering offers an opportunity to maintain or even develop new skills while making a difference by giving back to an organization or community. 

Strategic volunteering is essentially volunteering with a goal in mind. Not only are you giving back to an organization and its constituents by donating your time and energy, but you are also gaining new experience, skills, and connections. This targeted volunteering approach can in turn help propel your career in the right direction when you move to your next destination or repatriate back home. 

To ensure strategic volunteering benefits your career goals, consider the following:

Decide what skills you would like to enhance or develop

Think about your past experiences, research the skills you might need in the future if you were to start your own business or shift careers. It is during volunteer pursuits that you can develop the leadership, public speaking or presentation skills you always longed for. Sometimes expat assignments are great opportunities to pause, explore and try something new. Take advantage of the opportunity that being in a new country gives you to learn a new language! 

Pick causes that interest you

If your ultimate goal is to work with a specific constituent (i.e. children, the elderly, etc.) or issue (i.e. mental health, animal rescue, etc.), try to find organizations in your host country that serve those groups. Try to find publications, talk to people at the international schools, embassies, churches, who may be able to help you find these organizations. Some International schools also offer great opportunities for parents to volunteer through their Parent-Teacher Association (PTA) to get involved in activities like fundraising, event planning, hosting events for arriving families, managing the gift shop, etc. Leverage your network to find the opportunities that fit you best. 

Find an opportunity and organization that fits your goals

When selecting a volunteer opportunity, take the time to consider other factors like: how much time are you willing to commit? Do you prefer larger or smaller organizations? How much travel is required? Are you willing to take on a leadership role, or do you prefer to be a member of a team where others lead? Whichever option you choose, know that the organization will be grateful for the time and effort you put into it. 

Start your own volunteer venture

Maybe you identify an opportunity to serve a segment of the community that is currently not being addressed, or you have a brilliant idea to start your own volunteer organization! You may propose your own passion 

project or a new volunteer role to an existing nonprofit organization. One of the great benefits of the constant change in the expatriate community is the endless flow of new ideas that help these organizations grow.